[ Jaune stands up and moves over to Ren's side of the room, sitting beside him while also intercepting his reach for the book. ]
We went on a journey! Not like-- I mean not like our journey, which is also very dear to me. I'm talking about something real here, a consciousness-altering journey into a world you never thought was possible. And the deeper you go, it's like-- like you lose your mind but you just wanna keep going and going and going, and-- look, I'm not the most spiritual guy, but for a moment, I swear I could feel the core of my soul leave my body only to be absorbed by a fierce goddess. It's like feeling both helpless and in control at the same time - how can both those things be true?! It doesn't make sense, but it also does! It's incredible! Ahh, Ren, I thought I cried. I didn't. I wouldn't care if I did. I didn't. By the end of this amazing journey, it's like everything made sense to me, like, like I was viewing the world from a different dimension, and what I saw was a circle of what has happened... what is happening now... and what will happen. Boom!
[ He stares, unblinking, as Jaune goes through his monologue. He's not unaccustomed to listening to him go on and on about something, but usually it at least makes sense. This is... very hard for him to follow, and by the time all is said and done he still has no idea what he's supposed to take away from all of this. He's probably supposed to be happy for him? But honestly, it sounds like he took some sort of hallucinogenic drug, or had some kind of fever dream.
So without saying a word he lifts a hand, pressing his wrist to Jaune's forehead with a concerned frown. ]
[ It's much easier to just let it go this way than to engage in the mental gymnastics that would be required to get Jaune to realize that he was referring to the exact same thing. Path of least resistance, baby!
...
No one even told him they were together-together, and now he's learning that they hooked up. Man. He really DID miss out on some things by arriving late. ]
[ Jaune sputters and flails at Ren's last comment before standing up completely, as if that was the least mature thing that's been said throughout this entire conversation. ]
--OOOOOKAAAYY, good chat, Ren!
I'm gonna leave before this gets any more gross--!!
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Re: action;
How was your trip.
action;
[ They're so bad at this small-talk, and yet Jaune cherishes these moments with Ren all the same. Nothing awkward here, JUST GUY LOVE. ]
Well? Aren't you gonna ask me what I did?
[ This would be so much faster if he just got to the point...... ]
Re: action;
Not that he minds! He never does. ]
Was there something in particular that happened?
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Ahahahah! Well, Ren, a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell!
[ He sounds like he's trying to tell it anyway. ]
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[ He's already... reaching for his book again... ]
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[ Jaune stands up and moves over to Ren's side of the room, sitting beside him while also intercepting his reach for the book. ]
We went on a journey! Not like-- I mean not like our journey, which is also very dear to me. I'm talking about something real here, a consciousness-altering journey into a world you never thought was possible. And the deeper you go, it's like-- like you lose your mind but you just wanna keep going and going and going, and-- look, I'm not the most spiritual guy, but for a moment, I swear I could feel the core of my soul leave my body only to be absorbed by a fierce goddess. It's like feeling both helpless and in control at the same time - how can both those things be true?! It doesn't make sense, but it also does! It's incredible! Ahh, Ren, I thought I cried. I didn't. I wouldn't care if I did. I didn't. By the end of this amazing journey, it's like everything made sense to me, like, like I was viewing the world from a different dimension, and what I saw was a circle of what has happened... what is happening now... and what will happen. Boom!
And then we did it six more times.
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So without saying a word he lifts a hand, pressing his wrist to Jaune's forehead with a concerned frown. ]
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--I'm not crazy!!!!! You completely missed the point of that!
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Rumpus-Humpus! Hibetty-Dibetty! Diddly-Doo!
--what the hell am I even saying?! I need dolls.
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Tell me what happened, in ten words or less.
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[ He used up all his words. This is hard. ]
--okay. You've seen movies, right?
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A couple.
[ this isn't going to be over quickly no matter what, is it ]
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We didn't fade to black.
...
[ Jaune takes Ren's hand and holds it up in front of him, then gives it an awkward high-five. ]
There, now the team knows. Cool chat!
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But at last, a light seems to turn on in his head. ]
Wait, so you... and Pyrrha...
[ Can Ren come up with a better euphemism than Jaune??? ]
... slept together?
[ It's literally that easy, jesus christ jaune]
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[ Who said there was sleeping! ]
We did the pow-wow! The bing-bong! The shoo-ba-doo!
[ Yeah, he's definitely making up words at this point. ]
--a-anyway, I just... we didn't want you and Nora wondering. It'll probably be obvious.
...
Also. Might... need-the-room-sometimes... [he mumbled that last bit almost incoherently]
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[ It's much easier to just let it go this way than to engage in the mental gymnastics that would be required to get Jaune to realize that he was referring to the exact same thing. Path of least resistance, baby!
...
No one even told him they were together-together, and now he's learning that they hooked up. Man. He really DID miss out on some things by arriving late. ]
Well, congratulations. I'm glad you're happy together.
[ And he means it! You're his bro, Jaune, get it. ]
... Just give me some heads-up if I need to vacate the room, and wash the sheets when you're done.
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--OOOOOKAAAYY, good chat, Ren!
I'm gonna leave before this gets any more gross--!!